Musings On A Rainy Evening
It is 6 PM, and the sun has just set
The blue sky is still lit up with streaks of orange. Screeches, trills, squeaks and warbles fill the evening air as birds fly back to their nests.
A little while back, it poured heavily. While the rain has stopped now, the roads are filled with large puddles of water and the air is laden heavy with the fragrance of damp earth and freshly blossomed jasmine! How I love this smell!
I stand on my balcony for a while and fill my lungs up with the pure air around.
And while I am busy looking up at the sky, marvelling at its beauty and breathing in this sweet air, I suddenly catch sight (from the corner of my eye) of a neighbourhood uncle staring at me as if in surprise! Maybe he has never seen anybody look up at the sky before or maybe he never saw anybody practice deep breathing? Who knows, who cares!
For it’s the city’s first shower this year and it arrived magically just when I was least expecting it but badly needed it!
The last few months have been increasingly stressful for me, especially at work and it had reached almost an insane level this last week. So much so that I found myself contemplating some extreme steps to prevent a complete meltdown.
And then came this shower!
Like a long-lost friend who suddenly drops by to say hi and instantly transports you to a happy world, far away from your sordid reality!
Drenched in the first showers of the year, the city wears a new look today. The trees look greener, the air feels cleaner and the temperature has dropped a notch. One by one the windows of the houses and multi-storey apartments light up. It's almost dark now and the street lights come up.
The blares from the city buses from the not-so-distant main road, the whoosh of the cars driving by down below in the streets near my apartment, the honks from an occasional auto-rickshaw, the trill of a bicycle bell and the squealing of a puppy all entwine to make the city come alive.
I catch myself feeling relaxed, almost tranquil for the first time in what seems like an eternity!
A wave of optimism rushes in from somewhere and takes a firm hold over me. I decide to cast away all thoughts of self-doubt, negativity and dejection at least for tonight. I decide to live a little if only for the night and shut the door firmly on the ghosts of fear, worry, anxiety and depression that love to haunt me eternally.
I am a new me tonight.
One charged up with the light of a thousand suns.
One filled with hopes of endless possibilities.
One that is determined to break down the rickety walls of a life lived constantly looking back over the shoulder, overthinking every decision, worrying about losing the only source of income, toiling away like a slave in bonded labour to get paid every month, losing sleep over the tiniest mistakes and fretting over the uncertain future.
The new me shall have multiple sources of income, the new me would find peace, the new me would live a life in creative pursuits that help her unravel all that life has to offer. And most of all, the new me shall never shy away from living the present to the fullest, doing what she wants to do, being bold and uninhibited.
And when the time comes, she shall ride off into the golden sunset, glorious and unrestrained, with a happy heart and a smile on her mortal lips knowing she spent some meaningful time back here on Earth.